Here is a list of all that makes a person a Ben Torah, or at least how he may be recognized as such. The original post is here: http://divrei-yosher.blogspot.com/2011/04/things-by-which-ben-torah-is-recognized.html
He is a Yarei Shamayim, meticulous with halacha andmehader with mitzvot
He has a great desire to grow in Torah, in yirat Shamayim, and in tikkun hamidot. He does not stand in one place, advancing step by step.
He is a matmid, engrossed in learning, yearning to be atalmid chacham and a gadol baTorah.
He utilizes time and is makpid on sedarim and zmanim(and zmaneitefillah).
He is engrossed in his tefillah, davening with kavanah and not merely habitually.
His ways are pleasant and his face shines; ShemShamayim is beloved because of him.
He is giving, kind and always ready to assist and help.
He is mezakeh the community and is sensitive to its needs.
He loves peace and runs from strife.
He distances himself far from lashon hara and is careful with his friend’s kavod.
He is thoughtful and not disturbing.
He does not read things which are inappropriate nor listen to things which are inappropriate.
He is modest in his ways, in his dress, even in his room and while sleeping. He is mekayem ולא תתורו...אחרי עיניכם.
He is mekadesh Shem Shamayim in all his ways, whether in yeshiva, at home, or in the street.
Late last year, a terrible scandal broke out at Penn State, that centered mainly around the football program, and what a former coach did and what a current coach apparently did not do. Details need not to be rehashed, but suffice to say they are horrific and can be looked up if deemed necessary. Recently, the head coach of this program passed away. Many a writer has sprung up and gone on and on about how the wonderful good that he did should not be forgotten just because of his potential role in the scandal. But, I can not help but remember that the Talmud (I am forgetting the exact quote and place) states that just as a person can gain the world to come in one hour, so to can he lose it in one hour.
Translated from the Yiddish, the title means that Man plans and God laughs. I had my own experience with that this Shabbos. My plan was to spend Shabbos in a certain neighborhood, like always, with my Kallah. However, do to a snow storm on Friday that rendered the highways horrible, I realized about an hour before sunset, that I would not make it to my intended destination. I then called my friend and told him that I would be spending Shabbos with his family. He said fine, and I then called my Kallah and other people I would need to let know that I was not coming. Well, sunset came sooner than my car could move, and I found myself needing to ditch my car about a mile and a half from even my secondary destination. I have never walked that far in snow before, and I am glad to say that I found it enjoyable, and refreshing, and above all, I am proud that I was able to do it as well. Thank you Hashem for that. When I got to where I was going, I was glad to see a friend was there for Shabbos as well, who now that he was married, I no longer got to hangout with as much as we used to. In the end I spent Shabbos exactly where Hashem wanted me to spend it, even if I didn't plan it like that. The lesson is, sometimes, things go horribly wrong, and we can deal with it one of two ways. We can deal with it with Emunah and Bitachon, trusting that everything will work out (because it will) and that what is happening is the best, and therefore we can deal with it with a smile on our face, or we can get upset, and pout, and be miserable, and miss all the good that we would never have experienced if we had gotten what we wanted in the first place.
"Know and remember this well, my son: Man came into this world only to believe in God. This is the reason for his creation and why the entire world and everything in it, which is dependent on man, was created."
The above was from Reb Nosson's letters to his friends and family (number 43), and is a good reminder as to why we are here. It reminds me of a poem that I konw from Robert William Service, called Carry On. The gist of this poem is that it is easy to keep going and to carry on, if you will when things are going well. When things aren't going well, that we need the pick me up, but what happens when things aren't going well? We tend to shut down, to blame Hashem, and when things are going great, we tend to forget about all the tools Hashem gave us, and we feel that it is all us that did it. But we have to KNOW, not just believe, but know that everything good or bad that happens to us is from Hashem and meant to bring us closer to Him.
More to come, since I haven't written in awhile and I would like to make this more regular again.