Devotions

In the Breslov literature, and especially in Rabbi Chaim Kramer's fabulous book on Reb Nosson called "Fire and Water" there is much talk of one's devotions towards Hashem.  Lately, I have seen my own devotions increase, in significant ways.  I am davening more than in most of my past, I have lately been learning and reading more Breslov Torah, I have been binding myself to the Tzaddik before davening and each evening, and the last two nights I have Kriat Sh'ma al Mita.  What does this all mean?  Lately, it means I have really been feeling very close to Hashem.  Do I still need more Emuna?  Yes, that was illustrated to me when I blew a tire earlier this week and was more upset about it than I should have been.  Do I spend enough time in Hisbodedus?  Not nearly enough, speaking to Hashem more in my own words is something I need to work at more.  Have I perfected myself, or my avodah?  Of course not, we are put on this earth to grow, and that is a lifelong process.  But, every so often, we get to look back and truly see progress, and while it hasn't lasted a long long time, it does seem as if progress is being made.